Just sang Stevie Wonder’s “I Just Called To Say I Love You” to my little guy, cuz sometimes you just gotta serenade yo junk.
So come on, Children; lift up your hearts in song! Make that li’l Tinkle Monster of yours feel special. You’ll be glad you did.
Wilson Phillips are serious about douche.
This is billionaire Foster Friess, the bankroll behind Rick Santorum’s Super PAC and he’s got some Olde-Timey Wisdoms for you Uppity Womenfolk concerning the care and maintenance of your Baby Holes.
If you don’t want no crotch potato coming outta you cuz you didn’t have Jesus-sanctioned rumpy-pumpy, all ya gotta do is clamp an aspirin between your knees. That’s how how everybody did it back in the day, dontcha know.
“What’s a Period?”
Jill, come on over and bleed on Daddy’s lap
(Source: youtube.com, via boobsonmars)
SCRUB THAT BABY HOLE JENNY SCRUB IT WITH ATOMIC GUSTO
And fellas, don’t forget to wash yo nutz.
(Source: retrogasm)
